Starting To See The Light At the End of The (Cold, Dark) Tunnel

So much has been going on in the past month. I am completely done with my Peds class!!! (except for my last clinical the day after spring break, but don't get me started about that) Just one more class until graduation. It's so surreal... When I pass Adult Health 3(positive thoughts!) I will be prepared to be a nurse. Nursing school had gone by fast but yet felt like it's in slow motion at the same time especially during 8 hr clinicals.

This month was challenging for more than just normal school stuff. I was completely unmotivated and coasted through it. The weather been totally depressing and I desperately need springtime and sunshine with all its glory. I'm pretty sure I've had a vitamin d deficiency for the past few months and have been suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder. Since Peds was not a difficult class I seriously lost motivation because I need to be challenged academically. So I feel ready for AH3 because I've heard how super hard it is. I need to start getting my money's worth. I feel that the next 6 wks of the hardest nursing class will be a blessing in disguise. No matter what people say I see it as being do-able. I am claiming the promise of "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength."

My outlook is that God has brought me so far so of course He will get me through this make it or break class. There are always going to be hurdles I must jump in my future. After this class it's NCLEX. After that it will be finding a good first job. Then working as a nurse and going to school w/o burning out. There's always something. I can't give up now when I have so much ahead to look forward to.

The most providential thing happened last week. I went to a health career fair that my college put on with representatives from various colleges and SDA hospitals. I went to the booth for a certain southern California SDA hospital and was met with a recruiter who was not friendly or remotely pleasant to talk to. While I was giving my information to her (because I wanted to keep my options open for jobs) a couple of other nursing students who I did not know was talking with her. She was just as rude to them as she was to me. So I walked down a few booths to talk to other people. As I was waiting I overheard the other nursing students talk about how rude that recruiter was and how they did not appreciate it. I turned around and joined their conversation because I was taken aback from her behavior also. I expressed how I would love to line up a job for after grad. After chatting for awhile the girl tells me that her mom is a nurse at the hospital I had clinicals for OB and she would put in a good word for me to get my first nursing job this summer! We exchanged contact information and I believe that everything happens for a reason. If it wasn't for that rude recruiter I wouldn't have met a fellow student with awesome connections. Praise God because I needed a boost for my morale. Getting job offers totally helps motivate me to get to grad. Especially because it's in the area of women's health.

Speaking of women’s services, I talked with an unofficial lactation consultant who gave me loads of information about the profession if I ever want to take my career in that direction. I definitely know that I want to work with teen moms and I will stress the importance of nursing their babies wherever I work because it will give them such a healthy start to life. Lactation consulting is something I am considering. Yay! for positive career advice =)

Back to Reality

I survived my 6 12hr management clinicals on a mother/baby floor this week! It was a bittersweet experience. I felt so out of touch with reality getting up at the wee hours of the morning to go to the hospital, staying for 12+ hours, and leaving just to eat and sleep and repeat 5 times. I would see my friends for a brief time before I went to sleep every night. I've never felt so exhausted in my life it seemed like. I learned a lot in the hospital about staying organized and also about what I can tolerate. I became frustrated with mothers on my floor who couldn't care less about their own health and would have hourly smoke breaks instead of spending that time catching up on sleep or bonding with their newborn baby. Smoking is just a personal pet peeve of mine and I wish people would realize that they are missing out on a better quality of life.

It did make my job easier when patients had a readiness to learn or at least attempted to care. For each patient that got on my nerves there were 1 or 2 more who were as sweet as can be and really cared about their health and providing a safe environment for their baby. Since the good outweighed the bad it kept me motivated. One thing I love about nursing is that every day is different. If one day was a challenge the next, thankfully, was significantly better.

This past tuesday 1/12/10 was my last shift in the hospital and when I came back to reality I had no idea that such a huge disaster was taking place just a few thousand miles away in Haiti and that so many people were suffering nearby as close as my campus. It wasn't until Friday, 3 days later, that I saw news coverage on CNN. It was absolutely heart-wrenching and my prayers go out to everyone affected by this tragedy. It is also heart warming to hear of the millions of dollars that have already been donated to relief aid and that medical teams have responded so quickly. I pray that people will continue to donate to aid in the recovery of Haiti.

The Buried Life

I came across this new MTV show/documentary and it really inspired me to make my own "Bucket List" and to most of all never stop losing sight of what I want to do in life. It's easy to let stress, school, and just stuff get me off track and in a rut. So here's to a new year and another year of life. I plan to live up 2010 :)




Drumroll please.... here's my list so far!

1. Take a surfing lesson in Hawaii
2. Ride a gondola in Venice
3. Deliver a baby
4. Be in a musical
5. Get kissed in the rain
6. Eat a mango and/or pineapple that I've picked myself (fave fresh fruits!)
7. See a broadway show
8. Be on the news (for something good)
9. Ride an elephant
10. Help build a house for Habitat for Humanity
11. Visit all 50 states (22 down 28 to go)
12. Be in a protest
13. See a taping of SNL
14. Wake up to a sunrise on the beach
15. Compose a song on piano
16. See penguins in Antartica
17. Write a book
18. Cook a full course meal
19. Learn how to swim
20. Go to Machu Pichu
21. Swim with dolphins
22. Ice skate in Rockefeller Center at Christmas time
23. Go on a ferris wheel (despite my fear of heights!)
24. Meet anyone from The Office
25. Swim in the Meditteranean
26. Sing karaoke
27. Learn to speak another language fluently
28. Hug a panda
29. Go on a horse drawn sleigh ride in the snow
30. Slow dance with a guy
31. Learn how to sail a boat
32. Go to a murder mystery party
33. Visit a castle in Europe
34. Eat Swiss chocolate in Switzerland
35. Date a foreign guy
36. Take a dance lesson
37. Lead someone to Christ
38. Ride in a double decker bus in London
39. Film a documentary
40. Be serenaded
41. Jump a train car
42. See the Parthenon in Greece
43. Rollerblade while being pulled by a bike (Napoleon Dynamite style)
44. See a taping of The Daily Show
45. Eat something I can't pronounce
46. Cover myself in bubblewrap and roll on a hard surface
47. Go to the top of a lighthouse
48. Be a medical missionary
49. Go to the Olympics (as a spectator not a competitor)
50. Eat authentic pizza in Italy

Inspiration

I let blogging go this semester because it was SO hectic. Today I made the New Year's resolution to blog at least once a week. Another reason that I gave up blogging was because I couldn't find a background that suited me. That was until I came across a Shabby Blogs background on my friends' blog. Anyway the shabby-chicness inspired me to continue blogging!

It took me forever to think of a title for my new blog. Mostly because I didn't want to pigeon-hole myself into talking about specific things. So I figured "My Diary of Hope" is broad enough that I can talk about anything under the sun all while conveying an optimistic view of life. So here's too hopeful blogging :)